Finally

This is finally where God wants me to be. Or closer anyway. And by saying this, I don't mean that being further from Ammar is what God wants. I just mean that God wants me to take a step back and prioritize. God has a plan for me, and God's will be done.

I feel better than I have for the longest time just because I know I did something difficult for me, even though it hurt really bad, in order to step back and figure out where my heart is.

God only knows where my heart is, at least for now, but it is back with God.

No longer preoccupied by "earthly matters," if you will.
We are such fascinating creatures, aren't we? God has sculpted us so intricatedly. It's absolutely amazing. So amazing that we can only pretend to think we understand ourselves & each other.

I have other things to clear up, but first I would live to thank all of my awesome, clever friends, without whom I would have never managed to muster this much sanity. <3

Okay, now, clearing up. Apparently there was an awesome Sarah-bashing party a few days ago, where my ex-roommate and ex-boyfriend had a consult on my shortcomings. (flippin' sweet, eh?). So here is the thing, in case the ex-roommate is still peeking at my blog. I never hated you. No. I hated never having privacy, as much as anything.That was what killed me the most. When I walked into my room this year, there was almost a full wall between the 2 beds, and I almost cried with relief. I just need/want my own space. I got so used to it the first semester of last year. Then you moved in, and it was kinda like a sleepover, only forever. Have you ever had a friend over for a sleepover that lasted more than one night, and by the end of the second night you think you're gonna kill them? It was the second night, but that's kind of how it was. You're a good person, and you have a great personality. I just think were incompatible as roommates, and that living together was a mistake. I wouldn't change it, I learned from it, but it still made things very difficult. That doesn't mean I don't like you at all anymore. And it certainly doesn't mean I wanted to hurt your feelings by everything I've written in here, had it been my choice, I would have spared you that pain, I'm sorry.
Umm...If you now hate me, that's ok, and I understand, but I just felt like you ought to know that it wasn't your fault at all, it was just that I had no personal space, no sanctuary. I need that once in a while, you know. Sorry for all the pain.

And, with that I suppose I will leave you. For anyone else who read that, re-read the top part of this entry because that part was much more upbeat. I am really happy now, aside from hurting others, I wouldn't change anything.
I am where God wants me.
Finally.

Thank goodness.

Finally,
Sarah with an H is back.